Goblin Fishing Derby Results

Posted on May 5, 2013 by Ashlynn

Hall of Commons, Trammel, Chesapeake (PaxLair Times) – May 6, 2013 – by Ashlynn – At this evening’s Hall of Commons on a day allegedly named “Dudley Day” (where we were all forced to wear red “haha” hats) Mrs Bug presented the final results of the Goblin Fishing Derby. And there were some very impressive catches! I’ve no idea what they make fishing line out of in our realm but it must be strong of enchanted stuff.

The final results were as follows:

  • 1st Place: Ariel, with a huge crystal fish weighing 192 stones.
  • 2nd Place: Zymy, with a large fish weighing an impressive 174 stones.
  • 3rd Place: Jelly Bean, with a hefty big fish of 165 stones.

Those are some big fish and they’ll help make plenty of fish pie – a real Britannian delicacy. I also believe Crimson Slug caught an amazing 4 stone specimen though I am unsure what type of fish it was.

Anyway, congratulations to the winners!

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PaxLair Meeting: April 30, 2013 at the Mage Tower

Posted on April 30, 2013 by Ashlynn

PaxLair Statehood, Chesapeake (PaxLair Times) – April 30, 2013 – by Ashlynn – The next meeting will be held as follows:

  • Date: Tuesday, April 30, 2013
  • Time:
    • 9:00-10:00 PM ET – PaxLair Meeting
  • Location: PaxLair Mage Tower, PaxLair City, Felucca
  • Directions:  A teleporter to the Tower can be found at the PaxLair teleport hub at the Tea house.
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Goblin Fishing Derby Begins Today

Posted on April 29, 2013 by Ashlynn

Sea Market, Trammel, Chesapeake (PaxLair Times) – April 29, 2013 – by Ashlynn – For all those people out there who love to fish (and fish and fish and fish), the goblin fishing derby begins this very day!

All who wish to enter simply need to catch fish and then bring their largest fish to the floating sea market on may 4th, from noon until 5pm EST, and hand them in to Mrs Bug (she’s a foul smelling goblin, you can’t miss her).

There are prizes for first, second, and third place:

  • 1st Place: 5 million gold
  • 2nd Place: 3 million gold
  • 3rd Place: 1 million gold

Good luck, fishers!

Posted in Fishing, Pitmuck, Player Event, Sea Market | Comments Off on Goblin Fishing Derby Begins Today

Scrolls from the Archive

Posted on April 25, 2013 by Ashlynn

The Secret Library, Trammel, Chesapeake (PaxLair Times) – April 25, 2013 – by Ashlynn – As some may be aware, we have a library under construction (in the loosest sense of the word) and many books have already been moved to it’s location. In many boxes and in a disorganized fashion.

Having a fascination with strange boxes and their unknown contents I decided to rummage through them and turned up several strange documents. Samples of some of them are printed below.

Alchemical Properties of the Spring of Courage – Research notes by Ally Saffron

…most notably, since it’s transformation I have discovered that the water of the spring now exhibits some interesting alchemical properties. When prepared in the right manner it produces what I can only call a potion of courage – a concoction that gives even the most craven peasant not just the will, but the strength to face the toughest of tests.

Proper preparation requires 8 parts spring water mixed with 1 part each of ground black pearl, mandrake root, and powdered wyrm heart. Once throughly mixed, the tonic is heated for several hours in an alembic. The resulting opalescent liquid is then fit for consumption.

In at least half of cases the tonic has worked as desired, but there seems to be a failure rate I am yet unable to explain. The last subject given the potion – a laborer from Minoc – stood terrified and immobile as the headless one he faced tore him to pieces. I have since been reprimanded and told to be careful with any further tests…

The Lost Treasure of Sartarius of Magincia – From Issue 46 of the Magincian Chronicle

…once famed arcanist of the Council of Mages, Sartarius was always said to keep a great treasure somewhere, locked away by an enchanted key. The perpetually cold golden key shaped not unlike an ankh is said to have opened a crystal door that would otherwise kill an intruder with the same frost magics for what Sartarius was famed for.

Others claim the key opened a crystal box hidden away somewhere on the Isle of the Avatar, while others still suggest a tomb is what the key opens – the tomb where Sartarius was interred and waits to return as a lich.

However the point is moot for the key was lost years ago when as Arlinn, son of Sartarius, was ambushed on the road to Britain. None survived the attack on the caravan and everything of value was taken. The only other rumour speaks of an “eternally cold key”  once exhibited at the mages guild in Jhelom but since then, there has been no sign…

A picture of the key was found accompanying the article:

20130425ankhkey

On Gambling and Enchantments – A Paper by Gille of Moonglow

…but they say there is a market for everything and gambling instruments are no exception. As any prodigious player of dice games will know, experience will enable one to identify a loaded dice right away. The strange weight on one face and the odd way it rolls when cast are clear indicators, suitable only for fooling a novice.

Given the coin often at stake some gamblers no doubt will do all they can to gain an edge while hiding the form such an edge takes. Enchanted dice were thus an obvious result – having the same weight as regular dice while not rolling in an obviously strange manner. Some of the most well crafted die can even be commanded to roll a different number now and then to dissuade any suspicion…

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PaxLair Meeting: April 23, 2013 at the Shrine of Sobriety

Posted on April 23, 2013 by Ashlynn

PaxLair Statehood, Chesapeake (PaxLair Times) – April 23, 2013 – by Ashlynn – The next meeting will be held as follows:

  • Date: Tuesday, April 23, 2013
  • Time:
    • 9:00-10:00 PM ET – PaxLair Meeting
  • Location: Shrine of Sobriety, East of Britain, Trammel
  • Directions:  A teleporter to the Shrine can be found at the PaxLair teleport hub at the Tea house.
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The Spring Poetry Contest

Posted on April 22, 2013 by Ashlynn

Shrine of Sobriety, Trammel, Chesapeake (PaxLair Times) – April 22, 2013 – by Ashlynn – Saturday marked the Spring Poetry Contest and some fine entries by the many talented people in our alliance. I should say that category doesn’t really include goblins and nor should it ever but I must grudgingly admit that the little imps have always been supporters of story and poetry contests.

20130422poetry2Turnout for the event was excellent and the crowd seemed to enjoy the poems on offer. The entire contest lasted roughly an hour and once we were done, everyone set off on an expedition to the infamous dungeon of Doom.

As for the winner? It is my intention to officially declare who that will be at the statehood meeting tomorrow.

We had six entries (I THINK – someone let me know if I missed one). Nubby’s entry will hopefully be added at a later date as it is in a pictorial format (literacy rates amongst goblinkin are very low). All entries are printed below.

Editors Note: Nubby’s entry can be be found below all the others.

Finally, I must extend a big thankyou to everyone who entered and everyone who came to listen. I hope everyone enjoyed the contest!

Spring – by NANOC

Spring, tis a time of rebirth,
A time of renewal and revival.
A time to look afresh at the many monsters there are to slay.

Not a better time all year to sit and reflect…
On killing, maiming and slaughtering
The many horrific beasts that roam the lands and dungeons.

Take up your slayer artifacts,
And make haste to the forests and the underworlds.
Lay in wait, then SPRING into action and slay the beasts.

Have a killer SPRING everyone!!

SPRING – by Ozog Giantfart

DER BEES SPRINGS INA CLOCKS AN TINGS.
HUMMIES PUTS SPRINGS INNA DER BEDS
DUNNO WHY, SPRINGS BEES HARD TO CUDDLE WIF.
SLINKY MADE OB SPRING AN DEY BEES FUNZ
SUM TINGS GOT SPRING IN DER STEP
DIS MEAN DEY PUTS SPRINGS IN DER SHOES.
DAT WOOD BEES FUNZ, BOUNCING DOWN DOWN DA ROAD.
OH FLALFER GROW INA DA SPRING
BUNNYS PROLLY GOTS SPRINGS IN DER FEETZ CAUSE DEM CAN JUMPS FAST.

Spring! – by Lady Phoenix

It’s spring, it’s spring,
Oh I just can’t wait.
To find the fruit in the vases,
And the flowers on the plates.

I want to hear the warm sun,
And feel the robins singing.
Watch the scent of the flowers,
And smell the butterflies flying.

It’s spring, it’s spring,
I am so full of glee.
For the people will bloom,
And the flowers will be happy.

The gray fields shall be covered
With the magic of the meadows.
And the brown sky shall be painted
With the blossoms of the rainbow.

It’s spring, it’s spring,
How can I be blue?
For it is the time of spring,
And only spring brings you.

A Warriors Spring – by Kevin McBride

The gladding buds, the maiden’s sigh,
What ho, the gentle rites of spring!
The glance, soft touch, no treasures buy.

Into his lover’s arms he flies,
Hearts softened by the bardic string.
The gladding buds, the maiden’s sigh.

Elegant, the Scarlet lie,
His pulse grows quick, reason takes wing.
The glance, soft touch, no treasures buy.

Glory beckons, he bids it aye,
A song for blood his blade it sings,
The gladding buds, the maiden’s sigh.

By the virtues! Our voices cry,
Above the mighty battle sounds that ring.
The glance, soft touch, no treasures buy.

Cast off the gentle rites of spring,
To Folly’s arms his soul he flings!
The gladding buds, the maiden’s sigh
The glance, soft touch, no treasures buy.

Fishing in Spring – by Governor Winfield

Spring brings out the thaw.
Sun takes off the chill.
Worms eat up the logs.
We scoop up our fill.

Grass is turning green.
All the snow is gone.
Water flows in the stream.
We’re all up at dawn.

The boat is uncovered.
It’s cleaned for a bit.
No holes are discovered.
No need to refit.

Our gear is all loaded.
Our bait is all stocked.
No need to be goaded.
We set sail from the dock.

Mist covers the water.
We keep our eyes peeled.
“Oh my” shouts our spotter.
Pirates revealed!

We fire our guns.
The pirates fire back.
This isn’t much fun.
We withdraw from attack.

We dump all our chum.
We stir up the current.
Our sailors are glum.
Then up pops a serpent!

The waters turn black.
Our men are wide-eyed.
The pirates turn back.
They’re struck on the side.

Huge serpent jaws open.
We can just barely see.
Pirate death cries are spoken.
Bodies thrashed to the sea!

The serpent comes up close.
Our captain doesn’t flee.
They meet nose to nose.
Then it dives into the sea.

We welcome the Spring.
Our Serpent does too.
Our men start to sing.
We sail into the blue.

Spring – by Nubby

20130422nubbyentry

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Spring Poetry Contest Update, Doom Expedition & Tuesday Morning Adventures

Posted on April 16, 2013 by Ashlynn

King’s Men Theatre, Britain, Trammel, Chesapeake (PaxLair Times) – April 16, 2013 – by Ashlynn – Following the meeting this evening there have been some updates to our planned events, plus news of another regular adventuring expedition. So there is no shortage of things to do!

SPRING POETRY CONTEST

This will still take place at the Shrine of Sobriety on Saturday 20th April. But it will now start one hour earlier at 8pm EST.

There are prizes for first, second and third place. Participants should prepare a poem on the topic of SPRING to read out on the night. The poem can be as short as a haiku or as long as Kalundborg Church. Please try to avoid reading out something as long as Beowulf if possible.

Currently I am the only judge. That may change!

DOOM HUNT

Immediately following the poetry contest will be expeditions to Doom led by Kevin McBride. The expedition should leave at 9pm EST. Anyone is welcome and all spare golden skulls are also welcome as some intend to spend alllll night there.

One again, everyone is welcome to attend but skulls are not plentiful and skull hunts may be necessary.

Expeditions will probably be leaving either the Tea House or Nidaros Town Hall. I shall update with that information soon.

TUESDAY MORNING EXPEDITIONS

Sir Badger leads tuesday morning adventures. Venues are decided on a case by case basis. Adventurers gather at either the Tea House or Dragon’s Watch Tavern at 11am EST.

Everyone is welcome to attend!

Posted in Player Event | Comments Off on Spring Poetry Contest Update, Doom Expedition & Tuesday Morning Adventures

PaxLair Meeting: April 16, 2013 at King’s Men Theatre

Posted on April 16, 2013 by Ashlynn

PaxLair Statehood, Chesapeake (PaxLair Times) – April 16, 2013 – by Ashlynn – The next meeting will be held as follows:

  • Date: Tuesday, April 16, 2013
  • Time:
    • 9:00-10:00 PM ET – PaxLair Meeting
  • Location: King’s Men Theatre, North Britain, Trammel
  • Directions:  A rune can be found on the Tea House steps. The theatre itself can be found in North Britain not far from the Conservatory of Music.
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Realm News – Volume 3, Issue 7

Posted on April 16, 2013 by Ashlynn

The PaxLair Press, Chesapeake (PaxLair Times) – April 16, 2013 – by Ashlynn – I would say it has been quiet but the defeat of Vulcan at the hands of the Royal Guard would suggest world events are far from it. Still one crisis is always followed by another in our realm and I’m sure things will get busier again as the next lord of evil rises to take Vulcan’s place.

But there is good news in todays article too. I have been brought word that Pitmuck was raided by pirates – something to bring a smile to everyone’s face.

Dragons Watch Victors at Solstice Fair Hunt

The Solstice Faire once again came to Luna this weekend – the task presented before us by the masters of the fair being a team scavenger hunt of sorts. Though with a twist.

We all divided ourselves into teams of two or three, and we were given a list of items that needed to be recovered. The first team to bring back all the listed items would be declared the winners and would receive a plaque in the Hall of Victory. The problem was the list of items were all scrambled and had to be decoded before they could be sought out.

Ultimately Dragons Watch were the victors, managing to come just ahead in first place as many teams sought to find the most difficult item on the list – a plague beast mutation core.

  • 1st Place: Vran, Nanoc and Lauren
  • 2nd Place: Ashlynn, Nubby, Phoenix
  • 3rd Place: Jelly Bean, Klep-ter-alt

VULCAN DEFEATED

20130416fireandbrimWith magical keys in place, wards cast and a way into the temple found, the Royal Guard and it’s merry band of volunteers made their way to Vulcan’s stronghold to finally cast down the demon lord for good. Spirits were high, our ranks were swollen with warriors, and we were sure of victory.

The ritual using the Cryosphere was fairly straightforward – the barrier protecting the temple was quickly cast aside – and we were soon inside the temple, entering a vast underground chamber with a high ceiling and a staircase at the north end. The hellish heat made life particularly miserable for a heavily armoured group sure of combat and we slowly made our way in to finally face our foe.

Vulcan soon appeared and he was none too pleased at our trespass. Assuring us that we were doomed, he soon attacked, hurling powerful spells of fire and brimstone. But our numbers seemed to give us the edge and he soon fell beneath a barrage of spells, blades, and dragonfire.

Or so we thought. Appearing at the top of the staircase he claimed that he could not be defeated so easily and summoned a great dragon-like beast to tear us to shreds. But it was not enough and it’s blackened corpse soon lay at our feet forcing Vulcan to once again enter the fray.

After a long fought battle and many casualties, Vulcan finally succumbed to our combined might. His “madness” was apparently transferred into the kryss though the details of that are somewhat hazy.

The rest of the temple however remained sealed and we were informed that there may be future expeditions to explore the rest of Vulcan’s fortress. Perhaps a greater, more terrible evil lies deep within.

Pirates Raid Pitmuck (picture courtesy of Nubby)

20130416rotgutIt is not often I am able to speak kindly of those who take up the life of the corsair but news has recently reached me via one of the goblin folk themselves that they attacked Pitmuck a few nights past.

Making landfall on the island somewhere to the north and mostly composed of monstrous creatures, the corsair’s target seemed to be the Pitmuck Rotgut warehouse and stillhouse. It would seem that no one had informed this band of pirates just how terrible rotgut actually was.

How much of the rotgut stash was actually taken is unknown but it is believed to be a substantial quantity. I would have pressed my informant for more information on the pirates so other sailors know what to look out for but I suspect that there is a derelict vessel somewhere out there, it’s crew all dead from rotgut poisoning.

In Other News

The Pitmuck Party on the 15th was canceled this past monday but will be rescheduled in the near future.

Poetry Contest on the 20th at the Shrine of Sobriety. Don’t forget! There may be prizes!

Don’t forget – Adventures every thursday and friday night! Alliance meetings on tuesday nights!

Posted in Dragons Watch, EM Event, General News, Luna, Pitmuck, Player Event, Shard Event | Comments Off on Realm News – Volume 3, Issue 7

Friday Night Adventures (Now on Thursdays Too!)

Posted on April 13, 2013 by Ashlynn

Somewhere Dark and Dangerous, Chesapeake (PaxLair Times) – April 13, 2013 – by Ashlynn – It’s always dark, dank and cold in any dungeon you visit. Well I suppose with the exception of Fire – that place can be a real hotbed of activity. But anyway, with that in mind you should always wrap up warm on any trip and bring an extra pair of socks. Immersion foot is a terrible affliction so the healers of Britain tell me.

20130413gazereyeFriday Night Adventures

Are exactly what they sound like. Adventures that take place on a friday evening. Adventures vary from week to week but often involve visiting someone or some thing’s home, murdering everything present, and stealing their belongings. But don’t worry – our victims are either monsters that enjoy raiding or eating humans, or criminals involved in an ongoing criminal enterprise.

Lady Phoenix leads our friday night expeditions and they all begin with everyone meeting up at the Tea House in PaxOku at 8pm by the eastern clock.

Destinations are usually announced in advance, often at the tuesday statehood meetings. Sometimes they will be decided on the night, and anyone can request a place to adventure beforehand. Past expeditions have seen us visit the chef in Wrong Prison, a dance with the Sleeping Dragon in Tokuno, and a tea party with Lady Melisande in the Blighted Grove.

Thursday Night Adventures

Also announced at the meeting this past tuesday was the start of adventures taking place on thursday evenings. These also begin at 8pm with everyone gathering at the Tea House. This thursday saw an expedition to tame the Stygian Dragon. I hear it was a painful exchange.

Thursday night expeditions are led by Arkillian of the Great Horny Toads rather than Lady Phoenix.

Absolutely anyone is welcome to attend both expeditions and the more the merrier. Also increased numbers decrease the chance of a horrible death, which is a good thing too.

Finally a huge thankyou to Lady Phoenix and the people of GHT for taking the time entertain us!

And I hope to see you all there!

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