Shrine of Sobriety, Trammel, Chesapeake (PaxLair Times) – October 23, 2013 – by Ashlynn – There were plenty of stories to be told at the recent Halloween story contest – perhaps not all spooky – but certainly all interesting!
The rules for the contest were simple: each entrant would draw a random word from a box and would then tell a spooky story based on the word. There were prizes for first place and one as a consolation – the latter being a bag of turnips! With a rather fancy sash.
Though I was the host I managed to recruit Nubby to play the role of Judge, absolving myself of yet more responsibility!
There were seven entries in all. The winner of the contest was Icky Rotblossom with her tale about an old village. Victor Speranza took home the consolation prize for his creepy story about a chicken!
All stories told at the contest can be found below along with the word each contestant randomly drew.
Snow – Ozog Giantfart
Der beees a beery bad storm wif thunder an lightening, instead ob rain it snows lots an lots. Dis beees kerry cause it bees summer time.
Sum beees wrong, meees goes look seed. Finds a skeery lady ob da snow casting spell – frezzing eberyting except hers minions. Minions bees kill alla da frozen stuffs.
Herz freeze mees and in lebes mees der. Habes to wait fer da sun to melts mees – dunnno were lady ob da snow went buts herz out der sumplace. So bees careful.
Ivy’s Dark Secret – Phoenix
Well, one night in the wee hours of the morning I was wandering around Vesper, checking the taverns as NANOC had not returned home yet!
As I passed Governor Ivy’s office I noticed a candle was burning. I could not let the opportunity go by, so I stepped on some newly planted flowers. I stood on tip toe and peered into the window.
There sat the very pious Governor Ivy chatting across her desk with to skeletal pirates and an evil looking Orc Bomber. I was having trouble hearing what was going on so I moved around the building smashing flowers, trying to be oh so quiet.
And then I heard it – I heard Governor Ivy’s Dirty Secret
She said, “They are fools who will never notice that I…”
…and then I fell from the window ledge, knocking myself out I fear. I never heard the rest of Governor Ivys Dirty secret.
Mushrooms – Nanoc
While hunting the ever elusive Jackie O Latnern – a lady of the taverns and inns – I had heard that she lived somewhere in Ilshenar.
I traveled far and wide looking for her, to Farmer Earls though he had not seen her but mentioned a cave not far from his farm.
He would not let me stay the nite – someting about his daughter – so I traveled close to the mountain and finally reached a cave with moss and ivy growing over the opening.
I entered causiously and a large conjoured up mushroom tried to attack me. I duck, drew my sword and slashed at its frilly underside. It fell, more attacked and I ran – slashing my sword – to the back of the cave looking for somewhere to rest, but alas no space there.
What to my wondering eyes did appear: it was ASHLYNN!
The Old Village – Icky Rotblossom
Onz nite inz da dark a yung goblin mades herz way to an old village. Itz wuz a spooky place en allz da little goblin girls en boys were afrade ub itz. It wuz sed dat abter dark, sumthin terruble came outz ub da old village – sumthing toos terruble toos talk bout.
Weneber a little goblin went missin…. well, wees noes.
Wees noes.
Las nite mees went toos da old village. Mees wanteds ta findz outz fer sures wat wuz dere. Mees took a dagger en a bottle ub Miz Lucy’s brew Angelic Whispers.
Mees drank sum wile mees wuz wating. Mees wated en wated en wated until the bottle wuz empty an den mees herd sumthin deep in da old village, behinds da old well.
A big shadows rose up toos da roof. Da shadows gotz darker en darker. Itz leened ober mees en mees cried en wet mees shoes – mees wuz soo skeered.
Dats wen mees lost conscilousness. Mees woke ups dis mornin inz da old village mees sandals still wet an da shadow wuz gones. Mees dont noes eny mores bout wat haunts da old village.
Chickens – Victor
So Billy and Mandy are newlyweds from Trinsic. They decide they want to leave the swamp and go to a nice place for thier honeymoon so naturally they head to the grand vistas north of Minoc. While alone in the mountains Billy and Mandy being of a young age decided to celebrate thier new marriage.
Well one night… They hear a noise outside thier tent, a kind of scratching pokeing sound. They go outside thier tent and find a chicken eating thier food with a KNIFE AND FORK!
So being caught the chicken freaks out and starts talking! The chicken figures, ‘hey i’ve got some power, lets grant these two fools three wishes.’
So Billy and Mandy start talking over thier wishes. First Billy asks for all the gold in Trinsic’s coffers and boom. it shows up at the tent!
Next Mandy asks for all the animals in Skara Brae to be set free! So they are really happy now, lifelong dreams fulfilled, nothing left but to spend the rest of thier lives in happiness in the woods.
This is when the chicken starts to slink away but they say “uhuh! we gotz one moar vish!” – or however that trinsic accent goes.
They asked the chicken for world peace so nobody will ever disturb them ever again so the chicken…. turns everybody into chickens! BOK BOK BOK.
The Ash Tree – Holly Bloodhand
I’d sailed to Lost Hope Bay to lay low a while. Not much traffic up there ye see. Me ship was damaged from a scuffle with a particularly reluctant gem merchant from Britain – Ellen or some such.
I scuttled ‘er ship, but took quite a bit o’ damage meself. So I had to disembark to gather repair supplies.
Now north o’ Minoc is all rocks and trees but some o’ them trees be alive. Nasty blighters.
I needed to patch me ship, so I grabbed an axe and set forth, found a nice patch o’ ash trees not far from shore – least I thought they were ash trees ’till I hit one o’ them with me axe.
The grove came alive around me! At least a dozen o’ the ash trees were reapers. I were surrounded. They paralyzed me with their devil magics and I was fading fast from their brutal onslaught when I saw me salvation…
A lonely miner was wandering up the mountain, oblivious to the situation, didn’t seemt o be paying a bit’ o attention. Ore fallin’ on the ground and didn’t even mind.
So I stepped in his direction and cast invisibility on meself. The ash reapers were confused, but quickly noticed the absentminded miner! ‘Twas all the distractiion I needed.
I came out of hiding and dragged the miner by the arm to me ship. He made a fine human shield I tell ye. The reapers followed and I leapt onto me ship and blasted the blighters away with me cannons. Blasted the miner away too come te think of it…
But he didn’t seem te even notice. In fact te this day, if you walk up the mountainside north o’ Minoc ye can sometimes see a ghost wandering up and down the mountain, swingin’ a pickax that ain’t thar.
The Lake – Aratak
On the eve of my return to this world I decided to take a quick tour of the land. I wandered hither and yon recalling all of the old sites that I had not seen for many a day. I found many new monsters that I had never seen before.
Wanting to take some time just to myself, I sat myself down beside a small lake. The air was clear and the animals wandered near me. Twas a beautiful time I was having.
Suddenly…..ripples began to appear on the surface of the water. I watched closely as the ripples moved closer to where I sat on the shore. I was frozen to my spot wondering what was going to appear before me. All the wild creatures around me began to run away.
I pulled my bow into my hands and grabbed an arrow from my quiver – I felt I was preparing to meet my death. I jumped to my feet and placed the arrow on the bow as the ripples grew larger.
Now bubbles were appearing on the surface as the ripples flew toward me. I pulled back on my arrow prepared to shoot at whatever it was when suddenly out of the water appears…
…a giant sea serpent who says “welcome back m’lady.”