Pitmuck, Trammel, Chesapeake (PaxLair Times) – February 6, 2012 – by Ashlynn and Ozog – Goblins are a strange bunch. Short, smelly, sickly in colour. They are an anarchic band of creatures with little concern for hygiene or etiquette (or just about anything else). Communication with goblins can be more difficult than with orcs at times and they would seem to be the kind of folk you’d find in muck filled holes deep underground.
But it so happens that some of them managed to build a town on Horseshoe Island called Pitmuck (a very fitting name).
How they accomplished this feat, I am not sure though I suspect some of the few human inhabitants there helped. The band of imps quickly managed to make friends however (despite possessing a body odor stronger than a Wither spell) and soon joined the alliance! When the PaxLair Alliance calls itself neutral, they truly mean it.
I was curious enough to ask Ozog, the current leader of the… tribe? pack? clan? …to tell me a little about goblin kind. And where they get the milk for their ice cream from (as there are no cows on Horseshoe Island).
Goblins and their Origins
Long ago goblins and orcs were related. Goblins like to habe funz, orcs just wanted to clomp. So they went separate ways. Goblins are found under turnip’s leaves. There is no wot hummies call sex. Goblin color just come which side of the turnip they came from.
Most goblins Sorsoia come from the Abyss. They were captured by the Evil Jessica. Many many many years ago. After a wild they turned wild, from lack of ice creams. Ozog, Pillowpants, and Ido were the first to escape. They all lived ina small cave in Ter-Mur. Ozog remembered how to make ice creams. He figured if he gave some to nice hummies they would leave him and other goblins alone.
One while at the Luna bank he met BIG MAJIK LADY she thought he was cute and built hin an ice creams shoppe ina the bank.
The rest you know.
Ozog